That’s what separates the psychos from the functioning psychos right?

Why doesn't it have Dick Week?

How much longer do you want him to suffer? “People are so scared now, that you now have the male feminist. 20 Best Episodes of Bill Burr’s Monday Morning Podcast Prior to 2020 Bill Burr is a working man's comedian who puts in a lot of work.

Classic jokes that still stand up.

This fucking jerk off…Haven’t you noticed that every time the government fucks up McDonald’s has a new sandwich?I'd be like, 'Lady, get the hell away from me!

And people are like, 'No! I'm sorry.

Psychos, they just think it, fuck it they do it.

Here on earth or did you visit another land? You're old, you're gross -- I'm sorry. 'Look at that guy right outside my window!

Yet the Discovery Channel has Shark week every other fucking month.

The shopkeeper picks one out and says "this one can cut down 5 trees in 2 minutes". I think that’s how they just keep us dumb. You weren’t scared of nothing.

I don't know that guy.Fast food I think is like a conspiracy, y’know. ... With his signature one-liners and drawings, Demetri Martin muses on doughnut holes, dogs, sports bars, the alphabet's most aggressive letters and more.

We are just complete individuals. Home Photo by Wikimedia Commons. Quotes and Jokes by Bill Burr William Frederick Burr is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and podcaster.

Have one of your friends play the banjo... it'll scare the hell out of them. Director: Jay Karas . Maybe he’s up there now and his f—ing legs work, and he’s getting an angelic bl— job.”On the topic of male feminists, Burr makes it clear he does not consider himself one.“It’s f—ing nuts!” he says.

Quotations by Bill Burr, American Comedian, Born June 10, 1968. By You just ran outside into the woods.

'Having a dick is one of the most dangerous things on the planet. Jimmy carr and Bill burr Don't forget to subscribe for more videos. No it isn't! I think, ya know - actually, I don’t. Rarely will you find another comic so enthralled by serving "the idea", whether through Kierkegaardian prose or innovative but unreliable technology.

We don't care about each other. I'm sorry.

TV Based on 7 specials William Frederic Burr (born June 10, 1968) is an American stand-up comedian, actor and podcaster. There’s disclaimers, like, “Dude, you know I’m not racist, but, uh, these,’insert group name,’ ‘followed by fucked-up conversation,’ right?There’s this critical point where you’ve stayed single for too long and your brain switches from ‘You know, maybe I shouldn’t say that,’ to “Eh, fuck it, say it, see what happens.”It’s not until you’re an adult you appreciate how awesome a dog is. Bill Burr talks Twitter, writing jokes and making money as a comedian By PATRICK DONOHUE - pdonohue@beaufortgazette.com April 10, 2013 07:01 PM , He's just the way he is in the wraparounds on the show.

She was elected, not you. You're just some guy, your names Jerry, you play soccer, you got your ass kicked in gym class, and now you're doin' this.

Anything happens to a guy, it’s just considered funny.There’s no “brothers” when it comes to white people.

So wouldn't it be safe to assume that you wouldn't have the slightest fuckin' idea what you're talking about? I think that’s how they just keep us dumb. Before, when I rented, I didn't give a shit if there was a homeless guy jerking off on the street. That would be the scariest seven days in the history of television.”Your twenties is all about taking your childhood out on everyone that you run into.Who the fuck would run for a job where it costs 100 million to get it so you can make 400 grand a year? They should just sedate those people, drop 'em off in Afghanistan, just let them run wild. Online. Who needs cable when that guys sitting there rubbin' one out? What kind of a man, who still has his balls, is walking around saying he’s a male feminist?”At one point in the special, Burr takes aim at former First Lady Michelle Obama’s “Michelle Obama is doing an arena tour,” he says. Classic jokes that still stand up. What was his name?

15 funny quotes, stand-up comedy jokes, sayings and citations by comedian Bill Burr.


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